Muppet
Have you ever had one of those occasions where you're so completely certain of something it literally never occurs to you that you could be anything but right?
Because I just have.
Trying to get to the last of Mike/Underhand's Comedy at JoJo's events of the season, I disembarked from the tube, running a little late, and walked directly to Madame JoJo's location. It's on Old Compton Street. It's been on Old Compton Street forever. I know exactly where on Old Compton Street too - it's just opposite where one of those north/south Soho roads comes out. I've been a bunch of times, and I used to work just round the corner. I know exactly where it is.
Hang on though. It's not there. Has it moved? Or am I just slightly misremembering? It must be further down the road. Hmmm, but it's not. On none of the three trips I've made along the length of Old Compton Street have I been past it. It must have moved. Damn! It simply never occured to me to look at the address on Mike's mails - I just saw 'Madame JoJo's and assumed it was still in the same place. Oh well, I'll give a call and ask Mike where it's moved to. Ah - no I won't, my battery's dead. Still, not to worry, someone round here will know.
It is at this point that I discover that more has changed than the location of a drag club. Drawn from years of hanging out there, my mental image of Old Compton Street populates it with old school fags who know the scene like the back of their hands. The reality is that the street is now occupied by 50% tourists (useless in any circumstance - doubly so when seeking directions in one's own city), and 50% pretty but vaccuous young things who seem to know only the bar they're currently outside of like the back of their hands. Actual response to my question:
"Ooh. Er, it's not this place is it? (Indicates sign that says 'Balans') No? Sorry, I can't help then."
So hot and sweaty, and in decidedly non-comedic mood, I came home.
Where I've discovered that JoJo's is not, and never was, on Old Compton Street. It is, and has always been, on Brewer Street.
I hold my hands up. "My name is Jon. And I am a muppet."
July 22nd, 2003 - 22:12
LOL
You are not alone. Although I always manage this kind of thing when I’m in a group. They follow me obediently because “I know the way” and then glare and curse me when I admit that I am thoroughly lost..
July 23rd, 2003 - 00:23
*giggle* shame you didn’t make it, as it was a fantastic evening (I am allowed to say that, cos I don’t actually perform
. But you have got a really entertaining story out of it, so it’s not all bad!
we’ll be back, and it’ll be even bigger and better next time (Sept/Oct), so you can come to that instead, hopefully!!
July 23rd, 2003 - 08:10
bummer, i missed it too, so i guess i’ll have to do better than 3 out of 5 on the next run….
July 23rd, 2003 - 08:40
You’re just showing off because you made it to even that many….
And Mike, yes I will try much harder not to get lost, distracted by hysterical women, or generally be rubbish next time.
July 23rd, 2003 - 11:10
Well, I get to be an honorary muppet for reading your post thinking “Nope, it’s on Brewer Street” without realising that was going to be the sign of impending muppethood.
Better luck next time, Jon.
Oh, on a total tangent, and through muppethood by proxy, d4d™ has now had to change URLs to http://www.dummies-for-destruction.co.uk as it looks like the Wiley-muppets have persuaded the Easyspace-muppets to take the original d4d offline. Fuckers.
July 23rd, 2003 - 14:32
Jon you’re in VERY good company (ie me). I do this almost EVERY time I attempt to go to Tate Modern/Saatchi gallery (both locations) I always get the wrong bridge to cross the river and have to change my plans.
You’d think I’d learn after all these years and all this time getting it wrong CONSTANTLY. But no. I don’t.
I must admit though I don’t ever get lost in Soho… Like the back of my hand mate, like the back of my hand.