Gosh I Feel Secure
Sitting in the office this morning, a pair of helicopter gunships kept circling overheard - they came round seven or eight times in an hour. Given the unfortunate habit that helicopters have of falling out of the sky as soon as anyone on board leans slightly too far one way, I wasn't exactly reassured by their protracted presence over a busy part of central London.
Plus Ca Change
I haven't been keeping things up to date here for a couple of reasons - one is that I've actually been a bit occupied with the winding up the company stuff. But as of this morning, the company officially doesn't exist anymore. Which hit me emotionally rather more than I was expecting, but which is at least now done with.
The other reason is that I didn't want to jinx the other thing that's been preoccupying me since Monday. And that is the deal that suddenly took shape to move the team wholly into another company, to be the in-house new media team there. Things have moved extremely quickly, to the point that here we are, lined up to start on Monday.
It's difficult to put into words the mixture of sentiments that are running around in me at the moment - surprise, anticipation, excitement and a little bit of worry are all in the mix, with a fair few others besides.
Things are certainly going to be different.
Various Bits And Pieces
First off, thanks for all the friendly thoughts regarding the work situation.
Next up, longtime readers will know that each year it's my habit to take part in the Link and Think initiative for World AIDS Day. Given that this year's event is only a couple of weeks away I thought it was time to start plugging it and encouraging anyone with a site of their own to join in too. If anyone's interested, you can review my 2001 and 2002 contributions to get a sense of what it's all about, though the Link and Think site itself obviously offers a broader perspective.
Elsewhere, having come over all Doctor Who fan at Mostly Wanted, I can't not point out that the first episode of BBCi's new online Ninth Doctor story, Scream Of The Shalka is now online, with the remaining five released between now and the end of the year. The gaps between individual parts of the episode could be handled better (the repetition of the mini-title sequence each time gets annoying), but overall, I think it's pretty well done. Hint - do not watch with crappy laptop speakers alone.
One more thing - the 2 DVD set version of X2? Stonking.
Flaming Hell!
Bad pun, sorry.
Having been rather preoccupied for the last few weeks, I've neglected to catch up on any blogs for ages. So I totally missed Gert's appalling encounter with a firework, and now she's probably thinking I don't care.
But I do - Gert, I'm so sorry to hear about what happened, and I really, really wasn't being callous about it - I just didn't know.
An Odd Kind Of Failure
So the thing that I've *not* been discussing:
We're shutting down the company.
There: I've said it.
It was an extremely difficult stage to come to, but once we reached a certain point in time and perspective, the decision-making took on a life of its own. We've given it a bloody good go, mind you - two and a half years is more than many companies manage, and most importantly, we did at least try, which many don't.
In the end though, reality intrudes, and you have to acknowledge that things aren't going as well as they might, or growing the way they ideally would. It's utterly heart-breaking in many ways - the 'put your heart and soul into something for two years' way especially, and definitely a curious kind of failure: How many businesses can legitimately say that they've got clients who are genuinely happy with them, who,without exception and unprompted, keep coming back for more, have services and products that are tested and respected, and a well-established team capable and willing to continue delivering outstanding service? Not one that I've worked for previously, that I do know.
So I've had to make a group of people I like and respect, and who did their jobs brilliantly well, unemployed, which is one of the worst things I've ever had to do in my professional life. Letting down the clients comes second.
Right now I'm in the middle of the wind-up process, while simultaneously trying to work out what happens next, both for myself and for the others. Somehow being able to continue to do the good stuff we do would be the dream of course, but practicalities inevitably remain an issue, and the ways of achieving that are severely limited. I'm not giving up on the possibility, but I'm not putting it at the top of my 'most likely outcome' list either.
So hence all the down lately. It's not the worst news in the world. No one died, we're all able to pick ourselves up and move on, so perhaps I've been overdramatic about it recently. But it's felt pretty devastating. When you put everything into something over a period of years and it ends up dying despite your efforts, it's a blow. When it has an adverse effect on other people, it's that much worse.
But thanks for all the messages of support; they've really meant a lot. Anyone who's emailed and I haven't had a chance to reply to yet, many apologies - I *will* write back as soon as I can.
Being In The Know
I completely forgot to mention, and it's probably of interest to about three of my beloved regular readership anyway, but:
I've mentioned occasionally Grant Morrison's sterling work as the author of Marvel's X-Men for the last few years. It's well-known that he's leaving after the next story, but Marvel have been keeping the identity of his permanent replacement quiet, leading to much speculation in the fan press as to who it will be.
As of Friday evening, I know who it is.
And I'm very excited.
Cured
Following on from barking mad old religious freak* and his assertion at the weekend that gay people should seek psychiatric help, the BBC have run a very interesting article on the history of medical 'cure' attempts. It's necessarily superficial, but worth reading.
* What? I'm in no mood to be tolerant at the moment,
I *Heart* Patrick Stewart
I've been passed a transcript of a sequence in a Conan O'Brien programme in which various actors sit in a semi-darkened room and confess secrets of their life and careers.
Patrick Stewart, a man not known for taking himself unnecessarily seriously, did the one from which I've been given extracts, and they're simply awesome (and I'm totally hearing the following lines delivered in my friend Simon's voice, so when we finally catch up on the phone you *are* going to say these to me):
1:
"Whenever I am considering a role I always ask two questions. Does the story contain a strong female character, and will my character at some point nail that ass."
2:
"When people ask me if I think American or British actors are better... (drags on cigarette)...I always pee on their shoes."
3:
"Back in the seventies some people thought I was related to Rod Stewart. They gave us some very dirty looks when we started dating."
4:
"My favorite animal? The bald eagle. Not because it's bald...because it tastes good."
Thanks
To anyone and everyone who has offered comments of support about what's going on in my life at the moment. I'm only being oblique (or obfuscating, thank you Gert), because other people are involved, and there are therefore sensitivities in the mix that have to be borne in mind.
I'm hoping to be able to come clean about things in the not-too-distant.
But thanks again.
Bloody Hell!
After more months than I can count, I stopped looking at the London Bloggers Tube Map with the specific aim of seeing if I developed any local bloggers, because I just assumed none were ever going to show up.
But I just stopped by for the first time in ages, and discovered that there are TWO.
And one of them even links here. Hi Charlotte!